How to Find the Right Therapist: Expert Tips and Proven Strategies

The first thing you need to ask yourself when looking for a therapist is what you hope to gain from therapy. What are you looking for help with? Feelings of anxiety or depression? Difficult or traumatic past experiences? Relationship challenges? Therapists come in all shapes and sizes and narrowing down your needs will help you find a therapist with the specialties and expertise to help.

Take the time to look at the therapist’s bio pages or “About Me” page. These will give you a glimpse into the therapist’s personality and a hint as to how well you might connect with them. A good relationship with your therapist is a strong contributor to your work in therapy, so take the time to find someone you click with.

Finally, consider the logistical side of things: Where is their office located? Are they providing virtual therapy? Many people need weekly or regular therapy in the beginning, so be sure you can commit to attending sessions with your therapist.

Also, take the time to understand what form of payment they accept. Do they take your insurance? If so, what will your copay be? Keep in mind that the therapist does not have the details of your insurance plan, so you may need to contact your insurance company to get clear on what your financial responsibility will be week to week.

Types & Benefits of Therapy

There are various therapeutic approaches, each suited to different challenges or diagnoses. Here are a few commonly used methods:

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This approach focuses on the connection between your thoughts, emotions, and behavior, and how they reinforce one another for better or for worse. Therapists using this approach will work with you on analyzing your automatic assumptions, challenging your thoughts, and altering your behavior to reinforce positive change. This is a very common therapy method and has good outcomes for people struggling with depression and anxiety.

Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT): A variant of CBT designed for trauma survivors, helping them process painful past experiences.

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT): DBT was developed in response to finding limited outcomes of CBT for people with personality disorders or persistent depression or anxiety. It takes the concepts of CBT a step further, combining them with additional skills including mindfulness, emotion regulation, and interpersonal relating. It works to help people develop a deeper acceptance for themselves as they are, while acknowledging a need for personal change. The skills learned in DBT help people better cope with distressing circumstances and manage conflict more productively in their relationships. This modality is ideal for those working through treatment-resistant anxiety and depression, PTSD, Borderline Personality Disorder, and many others.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR is a relatively recent approach to therapy and has shown promising outcomes for survivors of trauma. It involves the therapist using lights or fingers to direct a person’s eyes from side to side while processing specific traumatic events. These movements affect the neurological state of the individual and allow them to reduce the emotional impact of these painful past events. While a newer therapeutic modality, there is strong evidence of its effectiveness when paired with traditional therapy. This method is meant primarily for work with PTSD and is also effective with anxiety and depression.

Internal Family Systems (IFS): This approach varies a bit from the cognitive-style methods above and views the mind as a combination of various “parts”, all of which have their own views and tasks in the person’s inner world. In this system, feelings such as anxiety or depression are not seen as nuisances to be overcome, but rather coping methods that are attempting to help or protect other parts of the person (even if they do so in a dysfunctional or distressing way). Rather than punishing or shaming these parts of the self, IFS instead leads a person to acknowledge these parts and work with them to address underlying needs more effectively. By addressing the deeper issues and relieving their “parts” from their burdensome coping, a person is able create more inner harmony and balance while effectively meeting their inner needs.

Questions for the First Session

The first session with a therapist is crucial for setting the foundation of your therapeutic relationship. The therapist will review their Disclosure Statement, outlining their qualifications, approach, policies, and your rights as a client. Take time to understand this document.

Use this session to get to know your therapist and determine if you’re a good fit. Consider asking the following questions:

• What led you to become a therapist?
  This can provide insight into their personal experiences and the work they’ve done to overcome their own challenges.
• How do you generally approach your work with clients?
  Understanding their approach can give you a glimpse into what working with them long-term might be like.
• Are there things I can do outside of therapy to accelerate my progress?
  An experienced therapist will have recommendations for how to invest in your own work.
• What are the best ways to address difficult issues between us?
  Discussing how to handle potential conflicts can lead to breakthroughs and accelerate your progress.

Finding the right therapist can be a transformative journey. By taking the time to understand your needs, exploring different therapeutic approaches, and building a strong relationship with your therapist, you can set the stage for meaningful and effective therapy.